When we let God change our hearts and desires it really is amazing. Sometimes He does it without us even knowing it, I think. Sometimes He does it and we resist and rebel. I really didn’t know He was changing mine. Looking back on the past 7 years I can see that He did. He did not necessarily take my former desires away, but He put other ones in me that take priority over the former ones.
I longed to be in foreign missions after I went on a mission trip in 2003 to Honduras. It was my first time out of country and I was excited. I had no clue what it would be like. It was heartbreaking but also inspiring. It was hard. Seeing people so in need of things that I had taken for granted every day. Seeing children with no one to care for them and nowhere to sleep was heart wrenching. Seeing very young men in prison or detention centers; that were so hardened towards anyone. It was an eye opener for me, a young high school graduate that came from a land of plenty. I had family who loved me.
I had food, clothes, bed, a home, and I had Jesus!
It shook me to the core. It radically changed how I looked at things once I came back to America. Like a believer set on fire for the first time I wanted to run, to go, to help. I wanted to go live there and be the hands and feet of Jesus. I prayed and prayed for that country. I had a heart for the people.
I never got to go do what I wanted. I never had an open door to go back there. I ended up going to Bible College, a small Baptist college in North Mississippi. I married the love of my life and we moved to the big city. I haven’t forgotten about Honduras or missions. Life just took me a different course.
I thought…….. “Is this really what I should be doing?”
What about the children, the women, the people? Where are they? God heard my prayers those days in my dorm at college when I asked Him to mold me and shape me into the image of Jesus. Oh boy, did he! He gave me 3 precious boys, who have done so much for me.
I fought it at first. I didn’t want to be just a Mother. I mean, I sit at home all day taking care of children who have no clue how hard it is. I wanted to do something big for God…..something important! Changing diapers? Fixing 3 meals a day, not to mention snacks? Important, yes very! Jesus washed the nasty, dirty feet of his disciples. He got down on their level, He served them. I am being the hands and feet of Jesus when I care for my children and husband. God began to speak to me about my children being those in need of Jesus. Just because they are born here in America doesn’t mean they know Jesus. No one does until they are told what He has done for them. It was my job to rear these precious children and guide them to the Lord in all that I do. It struck me. It was a glorious eye opener. It was like I had my own mission field in my home. I could literally pour so much of the Word into these boys that they could be so full of God like I wanted the people in Honduras to be. It was amazing.
I can look back and say, I still long to do mission work overseas, but for now I am so passionate about my boys. I love them with a fierce love and it’s not me at all, it’s all The Lord. I want them to know more about Jesus, God, and the Word that they will impact their generation at an early age. God put His heart in me for my children. It isn’t easy and it’s a lot of blood, sweat, and tears. It’s a lot of praying and crying too. But these are my little lost souls that I am I responsible for. I have to plant seeds so the Holy Spirit can move upon them and draw them to the Living God. I pray daily that when the Spirit draws them they will come and they will surrender. I want them to be radical for Jesus. I want them to love Him so much and live for Him in every detail of their lives. What we do with our children is so important. It’s so vital. They will have to make decisions we are making today and that is important work.
Mothers we have a mission field in our own home. Don’t forsake it!
Embrace it and draw your strength from the Lord. He will uphold you with His mighty right hand.
The work of the Holy Spirit is so amazing. It’s so sacred. God loves us so much and wants to use us, if we will just open our hearts to Him. What desire does God want to put in you?
Building strong marriages together,