It came in a manger, in the person of Jesus Christ.
Jesus’ victory over the cross and death secured our hope! And therefore, we have hope for our marriages.
Honesty. Overlooking. Perseverance. Excellence. These four things can turn a hopeless marriage to one sealed and secured with Christ, in God. Honesty helps us live with our spouse and others, in such a way that pleases God. As we deal fairly and uprightly with others, we bring out Christ’s character in our lives.
So how can this idea of “overlooking” help our marriage relationship? (Glad you asked!)
Let’s explore what it means to overlook. Overlook has several definitions, but there are two on which I want to focus.
Overlook means: 1) to excuse or pardon, and 2) to look over, as from a higher position.
Proverbs 19:11 advises that,
A man’s wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense. (NIV)
or, the NKJV puts it this way,
The discretion of a man makes him slow to anger, and his glory is to overlook a transgression.
It is to a persons glory to overlook a transgression.
Wives it is to our benefit to excuse or pardon our husbands’ transgressions, failures, short-comings, or sins toward us. (I like benefits, don’t you?)
Remember Hope who has come . . . that baby who came to earth over 2000 years ago? He paid a heavy price that God might “overlook” our sins and accept us as His very own.
But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8 (NIV)
We need to offer that same pardon to our husbands. We must die to those things that were of our sin nature and offer pardon to our husbands.
Overlook the small things because, if we don’t, the small grows large.
Communicate your hurt with honesty but offer pardon.
Excuse the offense.
It will benefit you and your marriage.
Forgive (overlook) freely and offer love lavishly as the Father did when He sent His One and Only Son.
Overlooking is also a positional word. Remember the other definition? To look over, as from a higher position.
I have been encouraged by the Lord to move to a higher position when I have been wounded by my husband. Why? I know after 21 years of marriage that my husband’s desire is not to intentionally bring me pain or hurt. So, when I feel offended or hurt, it is a good thing to rise to a higher position, to get a better view of things.
As we gain perspective, we can pardon or forgive a little quicker and easier.
We see the truth of the situation.
We remember how God looks at our husband.
We can see clearly the reality of sin and the remedy for it. We can overlook the offense and forgive.
The practice of overlooking an offense immediately offers hope. Hope comes to the offender and to the one overlooking the offense as they know they are exhibiting the character of Christ.
Give your marriage a little HOPE for Christmas. Love with honesty and move to a higher position and overlook the offense you are clutching so tightly.
Exchange the hurt for Hope and rise to a higher position.
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